Written by She knows me as a staunch atheist but, when I think of Her
I pray to God
On my knees, and I beg for forgiveness
I ask Him that She think of me
If only through a bright phone screen;
She’s radiant.
She could be the last sight I see and I would leave Earth happy.
Do you understand how weak you have to be
as a lifelong atheist, to pray on your knees?
I fully do not believe
in the after life, Jesus Christ, or the bible, at all;
It reads like fairy-tale-smut to me,
and I’ve always been more comfortable not thinking of God.
I’ve felt real-world physical pain, excruciating
dull aches, broken bones and gut punches.
I’ve seen some fucked up shit
and I’ve been in bad situations.
She makes me pray to God
for the first time
like I’m a lifelong parishioner,
like I have always belonged to Her.
I thought it was witchcraft, at first,
She’s more like an oracle or a wizard.
I want to be the goat She disembowels in Delphi
to show herself the world, with me.